Creating a Civility Identity
The basic question— “Who Am I?”
New civility asks that we think broadly about who we are— about our way of being in the world. When we ask “Who Am I?” we need to fold the personal values of, say kindness and thoughtfulness, into broader ones that address who we are as citizens and how we function in society. Why not devote a month of focused thought to significant study of a topic that has never been more important than it is today?
To address this broad question of understanding our civility identity, I turn to the concept of “markers”— those societal qualities that “mark” who we are— and name ten that are critical to our roles in society. (The activities suggested below build on those carried out under Civility in Action/Identity Markers.)
The first four— DNA-ascribed Self, Age/Year of Birth/Time, Gender Identity, and Race—are ascribed in utero.
The next three— ethnicity, class, and place--are established at birth and further defined as we live our lives.
The next three— religious affiliation(s), political affiliation(s), and educational opportunities— are shaped at home and develop as we mature into our own decision-making.
All ten are developed across a lifetime. All together, they offer an intriguing way to explore civility identity. I acknowledge, of course, the incredibly important role that personal qualities such as caring, generosity, and respect contribute mightily to civility. But since civility is most often thought of as making society itself run more smoothly, I devote this study to societal markers rather than personal ones. You will see, though, as you work your way through this identity exercise, that in positioning yourself as a social being you also position yourself as a personally humane one.
To begin building your civility identity, briefly describe yourself according to each of the markers, which I define below. You may wish to do this thinking in your journal, where you elaborate on how each marker shapes your identity. Your personal study will uncover how each marker is shaping your effort— and by deduction that of those around you— toward civility.
New civility asks that we think broadly about who we are— about our way of being in the world. When we ask “Who Am I?” we need to fold the personal values of, say kindness and thoughtfulness, into broader ones that address who we are as citizens and how we function in society. Why not devote a month of focused thought to significant study of a topic that has never been more important than it is today?
To address this broad question of understanding our civility identity, I turn to the concept of “markers”— those societal qualities that “mark” who we are— and name ten that are critical to our roles in society. (The activities suggested below build on those carried out under Civility in Action/Identity Markers.)
The first four— DNA-ascribed Self, Age/Year of Birth/Time, Gender Identity, and Race—are ascribed in utero.
The next three— ethnicity, class, and place--are established at birth and further defined as we live our lives.
The next three— religious affiliation(s), political affiliation(s), and educational opportunities— are shaped at home and develop as we mature into our own decision-making.
All ten are developed across a lifetime. All together, they offer an intriguing way to explore civility identity. I acknowledge, of course, the incredibly important role that personal qualities such as caring, generosity, and respect contribute mightily to civility. But since civility is most often thought of as making society itself run more smoothly, I devote this study to societal markers rather than personal ones. You will see, though, as you work your way through this identity exercise, that in positioning yourself as a social being you also position yourself as a personally humane one.
To begin building your civility identity, briefly describe yourself according to each of the markers, which I define below. You may wish to do this thinking in your journal, where you elaborate on how each marker shapes your identity. Your personal study will uncover how each marker is shaping your effort— and by deduction that of those around you— toward civility.
Ten Markers of Civility Identity
DNA-ascribed self with your inherent abilities
(intelligences and abilities assigned when you were born that distinguish you from all others)
(intelligences and abilities assigned when you were born that distinguish you from all others)
Age/Year of Birth/Time
(moment of birth that places you in time and identifies you with prominent issues and ways of living that are characteristic of your generation; the issues and ways of living defined by the social, religious, and political ideas and beliefs of that particular period of time— typically defined as Greatest Generation (born 1927 and earlier), Silent (born 1928 – 1945) Baby Boomers (born 1946 – 1964), Generation X (born 1965 -1980), Millennials aka Generation Y (born 1981 – 1996), Gen Z (born 1997- 2012), and yet to be named (born after 2012)
(moment of birth that places you in time and identifies you with prominent issues and ways of living that are characteristic of your generation; the issues and ways of living defined by the social, religious, and political ideas and beliefs of that particular period of time— typically defined as Greatest Generation (born 1927 and earlier), Silent (born 1928 – 1945) Baby Boomers (born 1946 – 1964), Generation X (born 1965 -1980), Millennials aka Generation Y (born 1981 – 1996), Gen Z (born 1997- 2012), and yet to be named (born after 2012)
Gender Identity
(Based initially on sex as assigned at birth as either male or female and possibly defined as LGBTQ+ in the processes of development and of understanding sexual orientation preferences; the “+” to represent orientations other than lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender, and queer; see Process #1 of CNC for further discussion)
(Based initially on sex as assigned at birth as either male or female and possibly defined as LGBTQ+ in the processes of development and of understanding sexual orientation preferences; the “+” to represent orientations other than lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender, and queer; see Process #1 of CNC for further discussion)
Race
(a highly contested term, race refers to a person’s physical characteristics at birth, usually defined by skin color; scientists point out that the differences between races are incredibly small and we are all very, very similar--in fact, there is more genetic variation within races than between them; for our purposes now, categorize yourself in the usual way, remembering than it is more accurate to think of yourself as a member of one human race; see Process #1 of CNC for further discussion)
(a highly contested term, race refers to a person’s physical characteristics at birth, usually defined by skin color; scientists point out that the differences between races are incredibly small and we are all very, very similar--in fact, there is more genetic variation within races than between them; for our purposes now, categorize yourself in the usual way, remembering than it is more accurate to think of yourself as a member of one human race; see Process #1 of CNC for further discussion)
Ethnicity
(a social group that shares a common national identity and its accompanying cultural traditions, commonly characterized by lifestyle preferences such as food, clothing, and holidays but also by belief systems including religion and politics [liberal/conservative]; sometimes behavioral qualities are ascribed such as outgoing/reserved and generous/thrifty; languages can cross ethnic groups but also have strong associations to them)
(a social group that shares a common national identity and its accompanying cultural traditions, commonly characterized by lifestyle preferences such as food, clothing, and holidays but also by belief systems including religion and politics [liberal/conservative]; sometimes behavioral qualities are ascribed such as outgoing/reserved and generous/thrifty; languages can cross ethnic groups but also have strong associations to them)
Class
(a social group defined in an inevitably stigmatizing way by association with amount of wealth, as in upper, middle, and lower and with their associated statuses, including place where one lives and amount of education one has; assignment to class categories a function of accumulation of wealth, power, and societal contributions over a period of time)
(a social group defined in an inevitably stigmatizing way by association with amount of wealth, as in upper, middle, and lower and with their associated statuses, including place where one lives and amount of education one has; assignment to class categories a function of accumulation of wealth, power, and societal contributions over a period of time)
Place
(the location where you were born and reared and that you identify as home and where you put down roots; defines something of who you are; can change often in our new century when technological marvels reduce distances among us and when jobs/careers and their associated locations are not defined for life as in the past; symbiotically linked to social class, in that the location of home is most often tied to economic means and issues, and in that its location is always associated with the quality of the schools located there, thus impacting one’s educational, social, and economic opportunities)
(the location where you were born and reared and that you identify as home and where you put down roots; defines something of who you are; can change often in our new century when technological marvels reduce distances among us and when jobs/careers and their associated locations are not defined for life as in the past; symbiotically linked to social class, in that the location of home is most often tied to economic means and issues, and in that its location is always associated with the quality of the schools located there, thus impacting one’s educational, social, and economic opportunities)
Religious Affiliation(s)
(a system of faith and worship, usually devoted to a higher power, with a system of organization; characterized by a set of moral rules consonant with a belief system that is usually documented in authoritative books; see Process #1 of CNC for more information)
(a system of faith and worship, usually devoted to a higher power, with a system of organization; characterized by a set of moral rules consonant with a belief system that is usually documented in authoritative books; see Process #1 of CNC for more information)
Political Affiliation(s)
(activities associated with the governance of a country, state, or community— or any organized group, actually— that sustains activities over a period of time; a set of beliefs that are most often characterized in a continuum of conservative to liberal but that can also be characterized by ideologies such as progressive or nationalist [Plutocratic] or individualist [Libertarian]; the debate among individuals in groups or parties or countries contending for and hoping to achieve status and power; a set of beliefs carried out by major parties, for example, Republicans and Democrats in the USA)
(activities associated with the governance of a country, state, or community— or any organized group, actually— that sustains activities over a period of time; a set of beliefs that are most often characterized in a continuum of conservative to liberal but that can also be characterized by ideologies such as progressive or nationalist [Plutocratic] or individualist [Libertarian]; the debate among individuals in groups or parties or countries contending for and hoping to achieve status and power; a set of beliefs carried out by major parties, for example, Republicans and Democrats in the USA)
Educational Opportunities
(the set of circumstances [including a delivery system of curriculum, teachers, administrators, and physical structures) in any community, small and large, urban and rural, to advance citizens’ learning and knowledge beginning in early childhood and continuing through high school and thereafter through an assortment of collegiate options, and, under conditions, life-long learning programs; the curriculum ideally based on documented knowledge, reason, fact, and truth; how best to fairly deliver education to all people, at all levels of society, a central issue in a culture of civility, and significantly related to all of the above markers)
(the set of circumstances [including a delivery system of curriculum, teachers, administrators, and physical structures) in any community, small and large, urban and rural, to advance citizens’ learning and knowledge beginning in early childhood and continuing through high school and thereafter through an assortment of collegiate options, and, under conditions, life-long learning programs; the curriculum ideally based on documented knowledge, reason, fact, and truth; how best to fairly deliver education to all people, at all levels of society, a central issue in a culture of civility, and significantly related to all of the above markers)
By figuring out your own civility identity as you study the categories, you will become familiar with them and see how they impinge on one another. In Process #1 (Interrogating Identity) of Creating A New Civility, I explore gender identity, race, religion, and politics at some length. Studying it will yield insight about how to proceed in your analysis. For example, our views of race or gender identity may well be influenced by our class, place, religious affiliation, or educational opportunities. Specialists in identity study call this cross-over intersectionality. Studying how intersectionality of these markers operates in your own lives will help you to civility, as well as societal, understanding.
It is well and good to understand your civility identity. But to really create a civility identity, you must act on your emerging understanding.
To that end, the next step poses five questions in which I use race as an example. Your behavioral introspection involves interrogating behavior. I pose challenging questions that probe intimacies of your personal life. Seem daunting? Probably. Nobody ever said civility work is easy— why we see all too little of it as we go about our lives. It’s easier to see egregious incivilities in another; it’s more difficult to take honest soul-searching looks at ourselves.
It is well and good to understand your civility identity. But to really create a civility identity, you must act on your emerging understanding.
To that end, the next step poses five questions in which I use race as an example. Your behavioral introspection involves interrogating behavior. I pose challenging questions that probe intimacies of your personal life. Seem daunting? Probably. Nobody ever said civility work is easy— why we see all too little of it as we go about our lives. It’s easier to see egregious incivilities in another; it’s more difficult to take honest soul-searching looks at ourselves.
Civility Identity Accountability
As does any complex commitment, civility requires accountability. Having worked through the activities above, you now have a new sense of civility identity, acquired as a result of describing and situating yourself societally according to the ten markers. Now you must search your bodyheartmindsoul and interrogate how (well) you bring this self-understanding to your role as citizen devoted to a new civility.
The approach I suggest addresses the complexity of identity issues that shape our civility ability. As mentioned above, it involves necessary boot-camp-type work in understanding and acting on our civility identity. The workout may leave tender spots and bruises. Think of it as character-fitness training that is equivalent to health-fitness training. Both require a bodyheartmindsoul commitment; the latter is good for you, the former is good for you and society as a whole. Finally, the approach represents a methodology for developing a civility awareness that has transformative potential. It has hard parts, posed as provocative questions.
The approach I suggest addresses the complexity of identity issues that shape our civility ability. As mentioned above, it involves necessary boot-camp-type work in understanding and acting on our civility identity. The workout may leave tender spots and bruises. Think of it as character-fitness training that is equivalent to health-fitness training. Both require a bodyheartmindsoul commitment; the latter is good for you, the former is good for you and society as a whole. Finally, the approach represents a methodology for developing a civility awareness that has transformative potential. It has hard parts, posed as provocative questions.
- How well do I understand what this marker [race] means for my behavior, my character, and my place in society, with special regard for my right to be treated fairly--and my obligations to treat others the same?
- Considering this marker, how well have I been treated by others? That is, in interactions regarding my [race], have I experienced discrimination, prejudice, bias, or shaming?
- How well have I treated others whose [race] is unfamiliar to me or different from mine? That is, how have I myself engaged in any of the above-mentioned prejudicial behaviors toward a member of a different [race]?
- In contentious situations that involve discussions of one’s [race] or of [race] itself, have I maintained equanimity, that is, have I responded with fairness, awareness, compassion, and reason, seeking harmony? And finally, a crucial question,
- How well do I bring personal insights regarding [race] to creating a new civility in and of itself?